Feliz Cinco De Mayo or Happy May 5th To All You Non-Spanglish Speaking Chumps

I took this pic from BlueMountain Cards BUT I have a subscription so I figured I paid for it, eh


Ayyyycarrrrrummmmba....we're makin' salsa. There is no particular recipe...never make it the same way twice and I never measure. 1 28 oz can of diced tomatoes, 1 15 oz can of fire roasted tomatoes, part red onion, part of a red/yellow/green pepper, 1 jalapeno (seeded), juice of lime, garlic, salt, handful of fresh cilantro, chili pwder and cumin and pulse w/the food processor until desired consistency. I got a thumb's up on this salsa from our friend's daughter who CLAIMS she doesn't like vegetables or spices.....hmmmm salsa=vegetables AND spices hehehehehe...it be a spicy vegetable dish of delight w/crunchy chips.




HOLY FRIJOLES!!These were the beans for the part-hay....dried black and pinto's. No recipe here either...never make them the same way twice. Simmer beans in 1 bottle corona and chicken stock to cover, 1 jalapeno, part of a red/green/yellow pepper, red onion, cumin, chili pwder, garlic, salt and then simmer, simmer, and simmer until you can't simmer no more. LOL, SNL flashback.....remember when Cheri Oteri had that one skit where she would say "simma down, simma down now"....I LOVED THAT. Anyway, and then mash some of the beans w/potato masher so you have thick, creamy and chunky.


The beginnings of Fruit Salsa and Cinnamon Chips. Cut flour tortillas into wedges, spray w/butter flavored Pam, dredge in cinnamon sugar and bake.


Hotcha out of the oven and oh soooo good!


Fruit Salsa=Strawberries, Granny Smith Apples, Kiwis, Raspberries and a sprinkling of sugar and then a couple of tablespoons of blackberry jam and a squeeze of lemon.


This is so fricking yummy beotches, I can't even tell you. It even sits in the fridge well for a couple of days to munch on....minus the chips of course.


Psuedo-Churro's......puff pastry sprayed w/butter pam, dredged in cinnamon sugar and then cut into strips w/fluted pastry wheel.


Churro=A tasty treat from mexico now made all over the states, a bunch of dough dropped in to a bucket of hot oil and then sprinckled with sugar and cinnamon...


Churro also=In mexican slang means a rolled mary-jo-wana cigarette or joint. We dipped the churr's into cajeta spiked w/cayenne and cinnamon.
Cajeta=Cajeta is a Mexican confection of thickened syrup that in its most common incarnation is made of sweetened caramelized milk. (same thang as Dulce de Leche in Latin America, same time and same bat place).

That is about all I got. Forgot to take pics of the quesadillas and the chili con carne con queso through all the hub bub. Everything was a success and they all seemed to have fun. We had about 21 people total. I got some great hostess gifts and I deserved every freaken one of them!!!!

My husband and I did our own Cinco celebration today. Fish tacos, Beans and Fruit Salsa Margarita cups drizzled w/leftover fondue.

Tilapia marinated in olive oil/lime juice and then grilled, red/white cabbage w/shredded carrot, chili cream sauce on a grilled corn tortilla. This was an adaptation of an Ellie Krieger recipe.


Margarita glass filled w/leftover fruit salsa, topped w/pineapple and drizzed w/mexican caramel and mexican hot chocolate fondue and a side of cinnamon chips.

I leave you w/2 parting words. TORTILLA TOSSING
I have heard a couple of my fellow Texan Bloggers describe tortilla tossing. I balked and snickered when I read their posts. Thinking how trivial and this couldn't possibly be fun. Well, I stand corrected!!! I tossed a tortilla into the woods tonight from my deck and my husband and I proceeded to empty out the rest of the bag....aiming for the road, joggers, small critters in our backyard. HOLY FRIJOLES is it fun. I know, I know, there are people starving in Cambodia and I am tossing food around like ball...save it, Brangelina will take care of them...and they are my damn tortillas and if I want to toss them I will. They friggin fly really far and they get this really weird "air" to them....kind of like a boom-erang where they fly low and then all of a sudden they will take off up high and come back in a different direction. I dont know. It was crazy fun and we will be tortilla tossing again! Sorry I doubted you Texas Bloggers.

Holy Crap.....I have now been sitting here for an hour. My a$$ hurts BIG TIME. I am outta here.
adiós - goodbye
hasta luego - see you later
nos vemos - see you
hasta mañana - until tomorrow
chao - bye
ya me despido - it's time to say goodbye
Me dio mucho gusto conocerlo - it was nice to meet you (m)
Me dio mucho gusto conocerla - it was nice to meet you (f)
gracias por todo - thanks for everything
que te cuides - take care
nos divertimos mucho - we had a lot of fun
me la pasé bien - I had a good time
que te vaya bien - have a good one
ya me despido - I've got to say goodbye

I don't blame you if you didn't read all of this......I sure as hell wouldn't have. Skim the pictures and move on........stick a fork in me, I am done already!